“It doesn’t feel like the lymphoma but … ”

posted in: Cancer 0

Husband had an awful nosebleed this morning. He thinks the nosebleed was because he simply blew his nose too hard but it shook him nonetheless. Although broadly he’s been feeling good since chemo, he’s feeling a bit rotten today and is lacking in energy and very tired. He’s been really tired for a few days now. He’s not sleeping well so is putting it down to that.

He knows what I’m thinking sometimes without me saying anything so commented, “It doesn’t feel like the lymphoma”. Then he hesitated and continued, “I hope not”. Me too!

He’s been really tired for the last few days. He’s also been working quite hard both outdoors and indoors with tedious but necessary paperwork. We have no idea what level of fatigue is normal after chemo – presumably it depends on the individual and whether or not they’re working. He enjoys being active and takes pride in his work. He says he’s being sensible but we have no idea what he should or shouldn’t be doing. I’m pretty sure he’s more active than the docs think he is! He is trying to be sensible and have a nap when he needs to though.

He is delighted that his hair hasn’t fallen out after Bendamustine and Rituximab. We were told that it might thin a bit but that it shouldn’t fall out and that’s been true for him. Hair just feels like another bit of normal to hold on to.

He has a headache today, possibly because he hasn’t been drinking enough. Headaches and nosebleeds are of course normal yet they can also be signs of something that is not normal. If the headache and nosebleed have anything to do with the lymphoma so soon after chemo then that’s not good.

But it may be nothing. All we can do is ‘watch and wait’, jokingly referred to by some as ‘watch and worry’.

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