I have a new appointment with the specialist. It all seems a bit surreal – I haven’t had any symptoms for weeks – bowels bit loose but that may well be stress, no bleeding, no pain and I’ve put a bit of weight on 🙂 . If I didn’t know something could be wrong I wouldn’t guess.
I am so desperately tired. But Husband is tanned, back at work and living his life again. Unfortunately that means all the niggly things about running a small business, trying to look after customers while working around hospital appointments and all the time wondering if we should even still be working or if we should retire.
8.30 am. Surgeon’s secretary rings. You’re kidding. He’s off sick. Good news – there’s another colorectal surgeon who can see me later on today. Bless him for stepping into the breach.
Apart from a near meltdown in the car park when the sun suddenly came out and I felt it was too warm to leave Muttley in car (solved by Mother coming to sit with him!) I did quite well with the whole extra wait thing.
Mr Surgeon 2 was very nice and took the time to answer all our questions. I have been amazed at all the doctors’ readiness to answer even tough questions.
They still don’t know. They want me to have a second sigmoidoscopy to take further biopsies. He admitted that even if histology says it’s not cancer it could be – it depends on how deep the biopsied material was taken from etc. ‘There’s definitely something there.’
Histology says benign on the earlier biopsies but every doctor who sees the scan and sigmoidoscopy images says they don’t like the look of it: ‘Whatever it is it needs to come out’, he advises.
So it looks like I’ll be having surgery but they want to know if it’s cancer or not beforehand so that they can plan treatment. I like planning. It’s reassuring.
Plan A – not cancer but needs to be removed, possibly with womb. My womb is apparently retroverted, lying the wrong way, pressing against the colon making it difficult for them to see what’s happening. There’s a 3cm lesion which is behaving like a locally advanced cancer ie stretching onto the wall but that could be due to the fibrous uterus. Apparently it also makes surgery trickier so they’re going to refer me to another surgeon. So my womb is being awkward 🙂 .
Plan B – cancer so 5 weeks of chemo / radio in a hospital some 70 miles away, Mon-Fri each week with weekends off then 6 weeks to rest and then surgery.
The scan shows that it’s not in the liver or the lungs so they seem confident that we can reasonably hope for a cure – ‘they get good results with chemo these days’.
So back to the lovely people in the Endoscopy Unit.