I think subconsciously I’m thinking that the cancer will really hit years after we’ve finished the business and sorted out the house – when we’re ready. Of course we’ll never be ready. We need to try though because if it … Read More
Cancer takes so much – hope for the future because this cancer is incurable – and even the present because we’re never quite sure how active it’s being. But cancer cannot take the soul. Husband isn’t sure he has one … Read More
Looking for travel insurance was depressing since it meant talking about the cancer. Some companies won’t touch people with cancer even if they’re in remission, others offer cover but at terrifying prices. I even have to pay more because of … Read More
I write this at a tiny port listening to small yacht masts chinking quietly in the breeze. It’s so peaceful. It’s as if we’ve been holding our breath for many months now, repeatedly grabbing a bit of air before the … Read More
We made it to France :-). Husband is feeling and looking good, enjoying swimming and sunbathing and clearly benefiting from being out here. We haven’t had any long (or medium!) hikes and he’s pacing himself while swimming but he hasn’t … Read More
Things got a bit crappier today. We went to the hospital for what we thought would be a routine appointment. I really must learn that no such thing exists when it comes to cancer. We assumed that things would be … Read More
I am so desperately tired and drained, weary to my bones. My ME fatigue seems worse, more deep-rooted these days somehow. I’m running inwardly – I’m not sure from what but it’s exhausting. I’m probably running from husband’s cancer, from … Read More
Husband is in remission, I have been told I do not have cancer. Yet we’re both drained by running our small business. There is a horrible false sense of normality while we’re working but the reality is Husband is very … Read More
I’m still feeling washed out, brain struggling but I manage to take the dog for a short walk. My legs feel like lead, muscles aching as if I’ve been running. Husband has an appointment with the haematologist. It’s been some … Read More
Routine appointment for Husband. Except there’s nothing routine about something that effectively tries to guess what the cancer is doing. I would say if the cancer is sleeping or not but that’s not evil enough – it’s lurking, we just … Read More